say my name and let go
by ironicallyblake
Summary: im absolute shit at summaries so... frerard, yeah thats good enough for me to read tbh


**So i have a new fic out for you guys! Yay! Sorry i'm so shitty at updates but you know whatever. Hope you guys enjoy! Love ya beans!**

…

I hate life. I hate people. I hate my shitty job. And i hate my good for nothing girlfriend. I can't break up with her though. We have a long complicated relationship, it just tears the both of us up, but we refuse to break up.

I have a shitty paycheck and my girlfriend doesn't work. We're living off of bare minimum. I thought i would like teaching high school, but now I realize i'm insane. High school was the worst years of my life, why i thought i would like reliving them, i have no idea. High school students are cruel fucking creatures. I have no idea why I ever had any interest in teaching these shit heads. Not to mention how fucking creepy high schoolers look like they want to pummel my face in. I should have just taught middle school.

Look at me! I'm 23 and already hate my life. I just want to travel but i'm broke as fuck. But Lindsey, my girlfriend, won't even try to get a job. God she is so frustrating. She doesn't listen to anything i ever say. And i'm not exaggerating. I have literally told her that i'm gay like 5 times and she thinks i'm joking. You'd think the lack of sex would give her a clue, but then again, she is always drunk to shit or high as fuck.

What. A. Bitch.

But I still can't bring myself to end it with and I have been friends for as long as I can remember.

And I guess we both kind of lost our shit once out of high school. We both became alcoholics.

She became a druggie, but i only do that every now and again. And we were both already addicted to cigarettes in high school.

So I guess we are both slowly killing ourselves, but it feels so damn good. It's like self harming, but on a larger scale. It feels so good at the time but then it only gets to be more of an addiction.

But I've been clean (self-harming wise) since high school. And I have been sober for a whole 5 minutes. Don't judge me, it's a work in progress.

"Gerard Arthur Way! Get your ass down here!" either that's my mother or Lindsey. Or both. I shudder just at the thought of them being in the same room together. I realize that i don't live with my mother any more and think about how Lindsey doesn't have to yell for me considering we live in an 1 bedroom apartment. I trudge down the stairs to see what the bitch wants.

…

I walk into class on Monday, regretting my life choices. But i guess it could be worse. I could be teaching something boring like math. At least I will be teaching something I love and am very passionate about. Art. I love art and music, but I'm not that confident in my singing voice and I can barely play the guitar so, art it was. Although my best friend, Brendon, teaches the music class, he is always in my classroom when he doesn't have classes.

Brendon is an amazing friend and I love having him around. He is so supportive of everything and says what he's thinking. There is no holding back with Brendon and that's one of the things I love most about him.

Another thing is that he is incredibly humble and sweet. That man has been through some deep shit but always keeps a smile on his face. And he is extremely good looking, but is so humble about it. Sure, he jokes about it constantly but everyone knows that he is just joking.

I look up from my desk as I hear someone enter the room. Speak of the devil. He just sighs and walks over towards my desk. Plopping his slim body down in the desk directly in front of mine, he sighs once more. I chuckle, "Is something bothering you Brendon?" He looks up at me and sighs, looking away. I go back to grading papers. He sighs a little louder to get my attention. I look up at him and give him a look asking him 'what'. He looks down at the papers then back up at me. I chuckle and slid the papers into a neat pile and put them at the corner of my desk. Leaning on my elbows, I repeat my question making sure to show him he has my undivided attention. "Oh," *sighs* "it's nothing." I roll my eyes at his childish antics knowing where this is going.

I go back to grading papers when he decides to speak again. "Oh, Gee! If only someone would listen to my advice." I give him half of my attention, "stop being such a drama queen." I tell him smiling a little at how childish and teenager-y he was being. "Okay, Gerard. I'm serious now." he says, his look darkening. "Did you do it?", he is referring to a conversation he and i had earlier this week about breaking up with Lindsey, before things got too serious. My smile fades as I go back to grading papers, not answering him. "Oh come on! At least tell me you told her about being gay?" I still don't answer.

"Gee, you know you're going to have to break it off sooner or later. This isn't healthy for either of you! Look at yourself, Gee!" he raises his voice getting slightly annoyed. I know I don't look too great, but that is just because Lindsey kicked me out again and won't let me get more clothes.

"I know-" I start, before getting cut off by the bell ringing to go to 1st period.

Rolling his eyes, Brendon stands and turns to leave before stopping. "Don't think this conversation is over." he reminds before walking out the door.

I think about telling her that i am gay as students start coming in to take seats. Thankfully, my classes before lunch are well behaved. It's the last class of the day that I don't like. I mean, there are funny moments, but they really like to test my limits. I'm just glad I'm not the gym teacher. 1) because ugh, physical activities and 2) that means I don't have to teach sex ed. I would actually rather kill myself instead of teaching that class.

The late bell rings, implying class has officially begun. I come out from behind my desk and the class falls silent. "Okay guys, so today we are just going to continue working on our 'projects'. You know the drill." I turn to sit back at my desk as everyone goes to get their projects and starts talking with their friends. I start to stare off into space as I think about how I'm going to break up with Lindsey….. or if i ever will get the courage to. Suddenly the door opens, I don't look up, as I just assume it's Brendon coming to continue his lecture. The class doesn't seem to notice either.

Out of the corner of my eye, I notice someone standing awkwardly next to me. I quickly figure out that it's not Brendon but in fact, a new student. "Oh, hello!" I say a lot more cheerful than I feel. "Um, hi. I'm Frank, it's my first day. You're Mr. Way, right?" he says, nervously. He looks adorable…. in a not creepy way. Like in a 'aw! Look at that cute little puppy' kind of way.

"Yes, that would be me. I think I saw your name on my class roster…. Let me just check real quick…" I say as I look on my computer at the attendance. "Yup! Last name is Iero, right?" I say looking up at him.

He stands there looking rather shocked. "Uh, no one h-has ever pronounced it correctly on the f-first try." he stutters. "But, yeah, that's me."

"Well then, we are working on a project right now. It's your decision on whether or not you want to do it, considering you just got here. The assignment is to create a piece of artwork that expresses you. My advice would be to find one thing you are really passionate about and use that as a basis."

He thought about it for a minute. "I don't think I will do this assignment…. can I do something else?" I think about something else he can do. Because it honestly doesn't make sense for him to do the assignment any ways considering we are almost done with it. "Have you taken a tour of the school, yet?" He shakes his head in response.

"Let me see your schedule." He pulls a neatly folded piece of paper out of his back pocket and hands it to me. It wasn't until then that I noticed the shirt he was wearing. I can't believe I hadn't noticed it before! "Dude, nice shirt! I love Green Day!" I say before looking down at his schedule. He has Brendon after this class, and then a few others, mostly in this hall. "Here, all these classes are fairly close, so I can take you during this period and show you around."

"Okay then." I stand as quietly as possible, so I don't disturb the class. He and I sneak out quickly and I start to take him towards Brendon's classroom.

"You a little nervous?" I ask trying to break the silence. He nods his head slightly. "You'll be fine. Mr. Urie and I are the nicest teachers here, and good news is you have us both!" I giggle. He shows a faint smile on his face. "All the other teachers are nice, as long as you don't give them any trouble. But Brendon and I are the best one's here."

He just chuckles a little bit.

"So, Frank, where you from?" "Um, I was home schooled for all of high school, so far. But I have lived here in Belleville for as long as I can remember." He replied, his voice shaky. Yeah, this kid was nervous. And I don't blame him. High school was my personal hell.

Although I was curious about why he suddenly wasn't home schooled anymore, I figured that wasn't my business. "Well then, welcome to Belleville high school." I say, again, more joyful than I feel. This kid really bumped up my mood. I guess it's because he doesn't look like he wants to punch my face in. But then again, the only class that I really don't like, is my last class of the day. That is the class that makes me regret becoming a teacher.

We arrived at the music classroom. "So this is the Mr. Urie's class, although he will probably have you call him Brendon. He hates being called "Mr. Urie", says it's too formal." I say opening the door slightly.

"You'll find him pretty chill. But then again I might be a little biased considering he is my best friend." I chuckle. He and I walk into a loud classroom. With everyone on their phones. As soon as they notice someone walk into the room they try to hide their phones. But after realizing it was me, they pulled them back out.

They know the drill, an administrator walks in the room, it goes silent, and phones go away. But they know Brendon and I don't care. I roll my eyes and laugh at them a little, "Where is Brendon?" I shout over them.

A few of them shouted back, "His office." This is the only way to communicate in here, it's so loud. "Of course." I mumble under my breathe. I turn to Frank, who looks slightly intimidated. "Come on, this way." He follows me over to Brendon's office, where he is sat looking quite pissed, probably at me.

He looks up with angry eyes and says nothing but "You!" in a dark voice before trying to lunge at me. I pull Frank out Brendon's office and slam the door, holding onto the handle leaning against it.

"Gerard! I swear! You better have a good reason for being here!" I rolled my eyes at this, and turn to Frank, who looked quite shook."Brendon is a little pissed at me right now. He'll be over it." I turn back to the door, "Brendon! Stop throwing yourself at the door and listen." The pounding on the door stopped. "I'm listening…" he said hesitantly. "I have a new student who has your class next period. Not to mention, why would I want to come here and listen to you lecture me? Use your head Brendon." He opened the door with a smile on his face, and greeted Frank. He took Frank into his office and looked back at me. "I'm not finished with you!" he hissed.

He is taking this a lot more seriously than it actually is.

… **.**

"Do you even love me anymore?" Lindsey yells back at me. "Well, you know. I'm gay!" I retorted. "Whatever! You're just saying that because you don't want to be with me anymore!" Ugh, this is why we haven't broke up. Because I feel the need to prove it to her that she is wrong. SHE IS SO FUCKING FRUSTRATING! "Fine! You don't believe me?! Go ask Brendon!" I storm off into the kitchen.

I can't fucking stand this bitch! I don't even know why I was friends with her in the first place. My phone starts ringing, causing me to jump. It's Brendon. "What?!" I answer.

"Is this a bad time?" he says in a sincere voice. I calm myself slightly. "No, I'm just pissed because of Lindsey. I came out to here…." The other end of the phone was silent. "Bren?" "U-uh… I didn't actually expect you to do… today.." he said in a quiet tone.

"Well I did and she doesn't believe me!" I practically yelled down the phone. But I knew I had to watch my tone with Brendon because he acts like my mom. And he is definitely scary like her.

"Gee, come stay the night at my house. While you are there, get as much of your stuff as you can. Pick your clothes up from Mikey's and come over."

"But I-" "No 'but's'. Get your ass over here." Brendon is a wonderful friend. He doesn't care if you call him in the middle of the night just because you're bored and he is never afraid to invite you over. Whether or not you have a problem. But most of all, there is no fighting with him. What he says goes.

"Okay, but I need you to bring your car to carry back some of my stuff." I say as I finally give in. "Okay, I'll bring over some boxes too, should I rent a trailer?" I think about it for a moment. "Good idea. Be here a soon as you can." normally I would have to put time and effort into planning something, but I know as soon as I step foot out of this house, I can't go back in. So I need to get as much of my stuff as possible.

...

 **Remember to kick ass and take names! Bc you're perfect!**


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